Please get this message to as many mothers in North Carolina as possible.
kirstik posted: "We need hospital stories. If you had great experience or if you had a bad experience in the hospital, if you had an awakening about the ‘safety’ of hospitals, we want to hear from you. Whether you are a birthing mama, a daddy, a doula, a nurse, we need "
New post on wheresmymidwife.wordpress.com
We need hospital stories. If you had great experience or if you had a bad experience in the hospital, if you had an awakening about the ‘safety’ of hospitals, we want to hear from you. Whether you are a birthing mama, a daddy, a doula, a nurse, we need your perspective. E-mail us at firstname.lastname@example.org, and please do not include names.
North Carolina seems to be the most hostile state for folks who wish to seek an alternative to hospital based physicians for maternity care. With no path to licensure for CPMs, physician signature requirements for CNMs and a murder charge hanging over the heads of anyone who dares to practice home birth, I think we win the "most hostile state" award. So maybe this awful environment gives those of us in NC a unique perspective on what's wrong with maternity care in our country, and motivates us to try harder to find solutions. It certainly has made me want to have face-to-face meetings with folks in power, to try and have a real conversation about the problems we are all a part of creating. In 2009, when the midwives at a private practice in town were fired quite suddenly, we immediately called the head of the Women and Children's Center here in Wilmington. We asked her for the name of the head of the Department of OB/GYN so that we could write him a letter asking for a meeting. She refused to give us the name! Why? He's just a person, like us. He's capable of talking and listening to others, having a thoughtful conversation, right? Over time, we discovered that the 'hospital' policies governing labor and delivery are actually written by the physicians themselves - the members of the Department of OB/GYN. The policies, which are not always based on evidence, are put in place by the physicians to protect them and the hospital from law suits.
Last summer, we sat down with the powers that be at the NC Medical Society to explain why we want licensed CPMs in our state. They listened and nodded at the appropriate times, but when we asked how they planned to protect families choosing to give birth at home, they replied, "Go to the hospital." In March, we sat down with hospital administrators at Outer Banks Hospital and explained why over 400 people in their community had signed a petition asking for access to midwifery care. They told us that they could not afford to hire midwives, because they were a small hospital and did not have the resources. Understandable. But when we explained that women are unhappy with the care they are receiving in their hospital, the physician at the table said that he believed that there were a 'handful of angry women' in the community. He also said those women were probably the type of people who were not going to be happy with any type of care they received and that they had simply decided not to like him. He then went on to say they probably 'hated all men.' During the meeting, Dallas Bassola (board member of ImprovingBirth.org and the local rally coordinator) made such an incredible point - whenever a mother tells her a story about being coerced or mistreated in labor, Dallas tells the woman that she must tell the care provider how she feels so that he or she can become aware of their behavior and work to change it. But most of the women she has spoken with say things like, "Oh, but he's so sweet and my son plays soccer with his son" or "But we go to the same church and it would just be awkward" or "I'm friends with his wife and it would ruin the relationship." And the cycle of fear and intimidation continues, and many of the providers are completely unaware that there is a problem.
And herein lies the problem. We have two groups of people who seem to be afraid of each other. Physicians view every pregnant woman as a possible law suit, a potential accident waiting to happen. Then you have women who have been conditioned to be 'nice,' to not speak out when something upsets them because they might hurt someone else's feelings. And the vast majority of women in this country also fear birth. Ninety-six percent of women go to hospitals because they believe that hospitals are the safest place to have their babies.
So, how do we begin to really have an honest conversation about how to do the work that needs to be done to put women back at the center of their care? To build a system that works for women, not a system that is made to protect providers and hospitals?
We must tell our stories so that the we can begin healing and moving forward. What is happening in our country in hospitals needs to be brought to the light. For too long, the media has perpetuated the myth that home is dangerous and hospital is safe. Let's really examine just how 'safe' it is to give birth in the hospital. [Before we get angry comments about 'hospital-bashing' or 'doctor-bashing,' I invite you to read an old post called, "Time Out for Bad Behavior." We are not, nor have we ever been, bashing anyone. We simply believe that we must address bad behavior in order for it to stop.]
I invite you to contact us at Where's My Midwife? to share your hospital story. If you had great experience or if you had a bad experience in the hospital, if you had an awakening about the 'safety' of hospitals, we want to hear from you. Whether you are a birthing mama, a daddy, a doula, a nurse, we need your perspective. E-mail us at email@example.com, and please do not include names.
***Please indicate in your e-mail if you would be willing to tell your story on camera. We intend to set up a YouTube Channel for this project. Below is an example of a woman telling her compare and contrast story - she had both a hospital birth with a physician and one with a midwife.
Expectant and all mommies, come on down and join us until 3pm today downtown marquis market @ 116 Person St, Fayetteville, NC!! We'd LOVE to see you!!!
Fear is a Liar, but with God's protection he SAVES!
All loving Jesus, hear our prayer for these expectant mothers who holds in their womb her unborn child. She may be frightened. She may be alone. She may be abandoned. She may be confused. Comfort her now in her time of need. Help her to understand that you will be with her at all times, even when she does not feel your presence. But Lord, help her to feel your presence often; this is a comfort to her and her child. Wipe away all tears of confusion and despair. Give her the understanding and wonderment of knowing the precious life that grows within her. Fill her with your peace and blessing so that she may bring her child into this world safely. Help her to know her own uniqueness and her worth as a human being. Love her Lord, as you love us all. Send her your Holy Spirit, and help her to know that she too is a child of God our Father. Protect, comfort, and keep her, in your loving care. We pray this in your holy name Jesus. Amen.
Babies are Angels that fly to the earth,
their wings disappear at the time of their birth
one look in their eyes and we're never the same
They're part of us now and that part has a name
That part is your heart and a bond that won't sever
our Babies are Angels, we love them forever.
Natasha Baker, Doula
Calling all mommies!! Come out and join us this Saturday downtown Fayetteville from 9-3pm. Hope to see you there :)
BIRTH, a blessing from above!!!
“Birth is God’s time. It can’t be rushed or programmed to suit anyone’s clock. It is a time to simply be there, respecting the woman’s space and the natural rhythms of her body. Think of how time ceases to have relevance when you are caught up in the presence of God worshipping Him or when you are in love and spending time with your beloved. Time flies by and you barely notice. Birth time is the timing of nature. Who knows when spring will come? Can a budding flower be found open? Yet in time, these things unfold. So does birth. I sometimes suggest to my clients that they visit the ocean and see the rhythm of the waves on the shore. That right there teaches you, deep within, so much about the patterns, rhythms and power of labor.”
Reflect upon the blessings of children!
Psalms 127:3 – “Children are a blessing from the Lord; the fruit of the womb a reward.” Don’t fret over the changes, the upcoming sacrifices, but rather rejoice in the gift and the Giver!
Deut. 28:4 – “Blessed shall be the offspring of your body and the produce of your ground and the offspring of your beasts, the increase of your herd and the young of your flock.”
Reflect upon His beautiful workmanship!
Psalms 139:13-14 “You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.”
Isaiah 26:3 – “You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on you: because he trusts in you.” Keep your mind on Jesus and the peace that passes all understanding will guard your heart and mind in Christ Jesus (Phil 4:7). Focus your mind during your labor…do not let it stray to focus on the pain and process, but rather on Jesus and His sustaining grace. This verse really spoke to me while preparing for my birth. I memorized it and quoted it to myself throughout the most challenging moments of my delivery. It was such a blessing.
1 Peter 5:7 – “Cast all your cares upon Him, for He cares for you.”
Faith and Perseverance
Hebrews 11:1 “Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen, it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.”
Natasha Baker, Birth & Postpartum Doula